On Recipes: Pumpkin Custard

I love pumpkin. So I made a pumpkin recipe and it was delicious.
The end.

What a good story.

I think I deserve a round of applause because as I have stated before, I am a horrible baker. I have no precision in the kitchen. I create things and mix ingredients while cooking and make decisions on a whim. Baking is scientific and I am not. Usually my attempts fail.

In this recipe I have, however, found a delicious pumpkin concoction that is somewhat fail-proof. This is a feat because most pumpkin recipes come in the form of pies, bread, cupcakes, muffins... all baked goods that I fear will flop. After trying it out, I have decided that this Pumpkin Custard recipe is a dessert made for failed-bakers like me and to prove so, I made it without measuring a single ingredient... and it was delicious. I especially recommend the crumble topping. To. Die. For.

I found the recipe at Tasteofhome.com. As far as my usual list of changes, there are really only two.

Firstly, I used 2% milk instead of the half-and-half. This was a decision based on necessity, as we had no cream or half-and-half in the house. If you have either, I would recommend it. The custard tasted delish with the milk but I imagine that cream or half-and-half would bring a richness and texture that it was missing. On the other hand, if you're looking to cut down on calories, it's nice to know that the milk substitute can be made without sacrificing all taste.

The second change I made is related to "pumpkin pie spice". I don't believe in buying pre-made spice mixes. Firstly, they are more expensive than buying the composite parts and secondly, they are limiting. Pumpkin pie spice, for instance, is made up of nutmeg, cloves, cinnamon, ground ginger and sometimes allspice. I can think of a few uses for each of those spices separately but only one for them once they are combined. Also, my mother has an aversion to nutmeg in food and mixing the spices myself allows me to add just enough that she won't notice it.

I'm sneaky like that.

Try this recipe, it's good!


Click here for the entire Pumpkin Custard recipe

On Nutrition: disturbing food additives

This article is a disturbing investigation into some of the additives in the food we eat. It's written by Dave Zinczenko, the editor of Men's Health magazine and the author of the informative "Eat This, Not That" series of books. Did you know that Baskin Robins Oreo Layered Sundae has 78 total ingredients? I thought ice cream was pretty much just milk, cream and sugar. Apparently not. The article speaks for itself, so I'll just provide you with a horrifying excerpt:

"Before making its way onto the value menu, fast-food beef passes through the hands of a company called Beef Products... Beef Products cleans the meat with the same stuff the cleaning crew at Yankee Stadium might use to scrub the toilets—ammonia. Every week, Beef Products pumps some 7 million pounds of ground beef through pipes that expose it to ammonia gas that could potentially blind a human being." (Zinczenko on the Big Mac).

Um, GROSS. Like I said, disturbing.


What's Really in your Food?

As a commentary on this article, I was recently introduced to "The Little House on the Prairie Method" (an invention of my much-wiser older cousin). It's a good test when trying to avoid all these ridiculous food additives. The rule is, if they would have eaten it in Little House on the Prairie (or basically if your great-grandmother would recognize it as food) then it's probably OK for consumption. Otherwise, try to stay away.

I think we can all agree that an ammonia-burger would not pass the test.

On Recipes: Oatmeal Smoothie

Here I will review a recipe by my good friend, Martha.

Stewart, that is.

Now regardless of the fact that she did a brief stint in jail, I think we can all agree that Martha Stewart still has something to share. Granted, we may not trust her with our investments portfolio... but when it comes to whipping up a table spread or pumpkin pie, Martha is still golden.

You know what else is golden? This recipe. I'll tell you why: because there's literally NO technique needed to make a smoothie. You just dump it in the blender and let the magic happen. This recipe also rocks because the oatmeal really adds that extra UMPH that I need in the morning and the extra fiber keeps my stomach from growling by 9AM.

My recipe (which of course differs a bit from Martha's because I can't follow directions) is as follows:

1 handful of ice
1 handful of frozen blueberries
1 scoop of Greek Yogurt
1 small banana
1/2 c. (ish) of old-fashioned rolled oats
1 tbsp honey
a splash (or two) of milk

"Handful" is a measurement that I made up. The way you measure a handful of ice, for instance, is to stick your hand in the ice maker and grab a bunch of ice cubes. A handful of ice is a lot easier for me to understand than 1 cup of ice. As I said before, smoothies are not an exact science.

I also used Greek yogurt, just because I like Greek yogurt. It has a lot of protein and I try to substitute it wherever I can for the regular stuff. It's also thicker than regular yogurt so adjust the milk (or other liquid) accordingly if you decide to go Greek.

Finally, I decided to use blueberries instead of raspberries. I love blueberries. They're full of antioxidants. Enough said.

The only other thing I need to say is MAKE THIS. It was delicious, quick and satisfying.

Thanks, Martha.

Martha's Oatmeal Smoothie Recipe

On Parenting

You may ask: Dear 20-something girl, how do you plan to write a post on parenting when you yourself have no children?"

Have no fear readers! I do not pretend to be a parenting expert. In fact, children frighten me to some extent and I'm not sure if I have a very strong maternal instinct. In any case, The Lieutenant and I are planning to wait for at least several decades before starting a family.

However even having no children of my own, I have had numerous encounters with other people's children. On a daily basis, even. As I've mentioned before, I work in university housing where (perhaps surprisingly to you) I regularly deal with parents. Specifically the helicopter parents. These well-meaning mothers and fathers are always swooping in to rescue their adult-child from one thing or another. Parents call our office to deal with their child's delinquent payments. They call to inform us that their child is being "bullied" and insist that they be placed with different roommates. They call to complain about the size of their child's room... You get my drift.

Not too long ago, I came across this article from The Atlantic Magazine and thought it was extremely interesting that it addressed almost this exact issue.

"...college deans have reported receiving growing numbers of incoming freshmen they’ve dubbed “teacups” because they’re so fragile that they break down anytime things don’t go their way. “Well-intentioned parents have been metabolizing their anxiety for them their entire childhoods,” Mogel said of these kids, “so they don’t know how to deal with it when they grow up” (Gottlieb)

The articles goes on to explain how in an attempt to make children feel safe and secure, many parents rob their children of the ability to mediate conflict and deal with common disappointment. By attempting to protect them from everything, they ultimately leave them unable to protect themselves.

It's a good read.
For the entire article, click here

On Recipes: Jalapeno Popper Dip

Today I am reviewing a recipe from my fellow blogger, Kevin of Closet Cooking. I chose this recipe because:

1. I enjoy reading Kevin's blog and can appreciate the challenge of cooking in a small space as I myself have lived in a few shoe-box sized apartments.
2. It is football season, which leads me to search out new recipes for what I call "kick-off food" (a not-so-nutritious but nevertheless tasty genre of cuisine)
3. The Lieutenant is inexplicably drawn to any dish that includes jalapenos, so I surmised that this recipe could not fail.

And now, on to the food:

This dip was everything that I thought it would be. It was spicy, creamy and just the right amount of h-o-t. I halved the recipe since I was not cooking for a crowd, however I could see this being a big hit at a party so if you're feeding more than two I would suggest sticking with the original recipe (you may even want to double it if your friends are really hungry). 

I made some slight adjustments to the recipe, some out of necessity and some because I am a terrible listener and do not know how to 100% follow directions

• I used only half of the fresh jalapeno that was called for (since I halved the recipe, that would be 1/2 of a pepper). I also removed the seeds and ribs, which is where most of the INTENSE heat is located. It is not noted in the original recipe whether Kevin of Closet Cooking did this... so I am not sure if he is a super-spicy maniac or if he left this step out.
• I left out the Parmesan Cheese. This gave the dish a creamier texture and it was still plenty cheesy.
• I used Extra Sharp Cheddar instead of regular Cheddar. Sharp Cheddar has an awesome flavor and I prefer it over regular Cheddar cheeses. I think it should be noted here that there is really no need to buy Cheddar cheese that is orange. Orange cheeses are colored by food dye. Go for the naturally white stuff- it's better for you. 
• I used Neufchâtel cheese in place of Cream Cheese. This is a learned behavior. Growing up, my mother always used this substitution to cut down on fat in dishes. I admit, it's not always a straight swap. In some dishes the flavor is compromised by not using the full fat Cream Cheese. In this dip, however, I think the Neufchâtel was a good substitute. The cheese and the mayonase lent a lot of flavor and the Cream Cheese was not missed. 
• I omitted the Panko bread crumb topping. This was a swap made from necessity. I was planning to do a substitution with regular bread-crumbs since that's what I generally have in my pantry. Alas, when I checked my stores, there were no bread-crumbs of any kind to be found so I settled for a cheese topping which I added during the last 5 minutes of cooking and popped under the broiler. I can see where the bread-crumb topping would add a little extra something though, so if you have the bread crumbs (Panko or otherwise) I would do it!

All in all, this recipe was a WIN. I plan to make it for The Lieutenant soon. Doubtless it will have him eating out of the palm of my hand in no time... at which point I will promptly ask if we can get a puppy. 

For the entire recipe click here!

Pictures borrowed from www.closetcooking.com

On The Crispies

Were you fooled into thinking this post would be about the lovely fall weather we've been having?

Nope, sorry.

I plan to dig into a subject that I find extremely interesting. First, some background: I work at an apartment complex that provides housing for 900 university students. Of these, 70% are female. Of these, about 70% are crispy.

What I mean is that about half of our students oil themselves and lay beneath florescent bulbs to tan their skin to an unnatural glow all year long. Fake-and-bake. Crispy.

Luckily for them, one of our competitive moves recently was to purchase a tanning bed and provide tanning services for free to our residents. This business decision resulted in much rejoicing from The Crispies (who would no longer have to pay for said services) and even converted some new Crispies to the already rather large flock. The tanning bed is booked solid for weeks in advance.

In an attempt to remain socially responsible,  we require Crispies to make appointments and sign in and out so that we know who is using the tanning bed. The Crispies are warned about the dangers of indoor tanning, although the freckled masses still come and tan. They are allowed to make up to 3 appointments a week. If they take advantage or if appointments are missed without notice, The Crispies can be put on the "Tan-Ban" (aka have their tanning privileges revoked for the semester).

The creation of the "Tan-Ban" has had rather startling results. I have seen girls cry, throw temper tantrums and/or loudly spout profanity after learning that they have made the list. This behavior has led me to contemplate this strange desire to be bronzed.

What's with the striving for tanned skin? I can admit that while in my teens I also chased the bronze for a while, though I still can't put my finger on exactly why I thought it was so important. It makes me wonder, what is it about being browned that makes us feel more beautiful?

The fashion of skin interests me because bronze is not always synonymous with beautiful. In ancient Greece and Rome, women used to lighten their faces with chalk or lead to appear paler (clearly with disastrous consequences in the latter case). In some Asian cultures flawlessly milky skin is still the goal. In China, women have been known to use "whitening correctors" and bleaching agents to try and lighten their completion. In fact, pale skin was fashionable almost everywhere until the 1920's (see the two articles at the bottom of this post if you're interested in more).

So maybe it's not just The Crispies. Throughout history women have been changing their appearance based on what society considers beautiful. I propose a new movement. Let's get natural. Whether you're olive, milky or freckled, it's all beautiful. And let's face it, there's nothing worse than a obvious orange-y glow in the dead of winter.

I'll let you in on what changed my mind. Since entering my 20's I've stopped worshiping the sun god, indoor or out. For me, it was not the sudden realization that sun-tanning can cause me cancer as much as a desire to not look like this when I am 40:

I enjoy a dose of vitamin D just as much as the next girl, but as far as bleaching creams or fake-and-bake sessions go, I'll stay natural. Thank you very much.


LA Times Article
Sunday Times Article

On Hollywood

Is it who you know or what you know that matters?

Intelligence, ambition, and talent make a difference. Without these it is difficult to achieve much, if anything.
But being well connected never hurt either.

In Hollywood, famous families pass popularity down through their line, although the silver spoon in their mouths may well be replaced with a Golden Globe in hand. Am I being dramatic?

Angelina Jolie's father is actor Jon Voigt, Kate Hudson was born to actress Goldie Hawn, Ben Stiller's dad is actor and comedian Jerry Stiller, Colin Hanks belongs to Tom Hanks, Charlie Sheen's dad Martin Sheen probably now wishes neither of them had become famous, Jaiden Smith has Will Smith as a dad...

The list goes on.

This is not to say that these people are not talented, because some of them are. They simply were born into a position where they were set up to be noticed for those talents. As most of the rest of us were not.

There are obviously many cases where this does not hold. Actors like Natalie Portman, Bradley Cooper, and Renee Zellweger who have risen to the top solely based on their own talents. These actors I can admire most, knowing that they have had to forge their own way.

As a solution to this dilemma, I have decided that in my next life, I will simply be re-born as the daughter of Justin Beiber.

On Books: The Help

Whenever a movie based on a novel comes out, I cringe a little bit. Maybe it's a personal bias, but fiction never translates absolutely from the page to the screen. Nevertheless, having recently finished this book, I am REALLY excited to see the movie.

This book was particularly interesting to me because of my family background. My mother is from an Italian immigrant family and was raised in Philadelphia's Little Italy. She attended Catholic school K-12 and can still remember the two girls in her graduating class who did NOT have Italian last names. My father was born and raised in rural New Hampshire. He had 5 brothers and sisters. There wasn't much money. Needless to say, nobody in my family tree ever employed any servants and the Civil Rights movement was news from afar that had little impact on their personal lives.

I guess because of this, I think of it as ancient history. Because it didn't directly affect my family I think of it as something that happened a long time ago. I've even wondered at times why black/white racism is still such a big issue.

This book shed new light on the subject.

I realized while reading that had my mother been born into a different social class and in a different location, she too may have been practically raised by a black maid, like so many of the characters in the book were. Had my father been the son of a Mississippi businessman, he could have been nursed when he was sick and fed breakfast each morning by a servant who was more invested in his well-being than his own mother. And had this been the case, they both would have been taught somewhere along the way that the same person who cared for them as children was less human, less important and less worthy of respect than they, simply because of their skin color.

Which made me realize... this is not ancient history. This is current. This is my parent's generation and so my generation is certainly directly affected.

Call this an obvious realization if you will, but it changed my perspective.
Read the book. It's good.

For Whom the Bell Tolls (a post On Weddings)

I'm a pretty practical person. I am thrifty and I like a bargain. I like things to make sense and for decisions to be logical. I don't like massive shows of emotion. They make me uncomfortable.

BUT

In 65 days I will put on an expensive ivory dress that I will wear one time only. I will spend hours getting primped and I will finally walk down the aisle to become The Lieutenant's wife. The celebration has taken 8 months to plan but will last only a couple of hours

...and I'm super excited.

So what is it about this wedding that throws my usual practicality out the window and causes me to become a person who cries without warning and maintains a countdown in my head? I guess I've got a romantic side.

But the thing is, my countdown is not really about the wedding. It's about what comes after. It's about having someone who loves me enough to want me around for forever. It's about knowing that person will always be there because he is dependable and trustworthy. It's about knowing that even though things will not be perfect, they will always be OK because whatever happens, we will work it out together. To me, THAT'S romantic.

And I, for one, can't wait.

On Becoming A Lady of Leisure

As a 20-something girl in the full time work force, I have found the 9-to-5 (or in my case 8-to-5) world to be most disappointing. As I told The Lieutenant recently, my new aspiration in life is to become a Lady of Leisure. There are several supporting reasons for this decision noted below:

1. When faced with a choice between work and leisure, I always choose leisure- a value that every Lady of Leisure must uphold.
2. A Lady of Leisure should be always occupied, but never busy. For instance: I have several dozen craft ideas in various stages of completion. Because of my constant inspiration, I will always be occupied. Because of my wonderful lack of follow-through, I will never be busy. 
3. Everyone knows that a Lady of Leisure must have, at best, a voracious appetite for books- at least a mild interest in the current events and the news. I happen to be a fantastic reader and can finish an interesting book within record time. This talent should not be overlooked.
4. Obviously a Lady of Leisure must not have children, as children are the anthithesis of leisure. I do not have children, therefore I am an excellent candidate

Obstacles to said goal (and my plans to overcome them) are as follows:

• A true Lady of Leisure should be independently wealthy or have a wealthy benefactor, therefore freeing her to enjoy whatever pastime she sees fit. I unfortunately have neither, but am currently looking into whether a hard-working husband can be substituted.
• The social stigma of being well-educated yet unemployed: I believe that this misunderstanding can be cleared up by simply explaining my situation to the interested parties. I find that in this time of economic unrest it is only fair that I (who have no desire to work) allow my job to be bestowed upon one of those souls who are unhappily unemployed. Therefore, my becoming a lady of leisure is for the greater good.

I am convinced that when faced with these facts, The Lieutenant will have no other option than to see the sense in my decision.

On The Follow Through

I have found in this blog, and in many other life endeavors, a fundamental truth about myself as a person.

I suck on the follow-through.

I have good ideas and at times I'm quite good at implementing them. A lot of times, though, I have a tendency to hop from one good idea to another without actually finishing anything.

This is an area where I need improvement, and this blog is practice.

After all, we all have room to improve.

On Wives & Lies (How I feel about Mormonism: Part 1)

WARNING: this post may be deemed controversial and is not exactly light reading. 

Want to learn something about me?

I'm a self-educated Mormon scholar.

Let me explain. I am a Christian and I am not a Mormon. (Although Mormons also describe themselves as Christians- more on that in another post). Nevertheless, I have developed a burning curiousity about this odd religion. We can blame it on the fact that while I was in college I dated guy who was Mormon. Or maybe the fact that I used to drive around the Washington DC beltway and wonder what purpose of the huge, white Mormon DC Temple was.

The thing is, it seems innocuous enough on the surface. I attended ward meetings (church) with said Ex-Boyfriend and it was interesting, but not terribly different than other church meetings. That is until I started reading up on church history and the tenets of their belief system. 

For those who are completely unfamiliar here's the (very, VERY basic) background: The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (or "LDS") follows the teachings of Joseph Smith, who was "led by god" to a set of buried golden plates from which he translated the Book of Mormon (which was supposed to be a new testament of Jesus, supplemental to the Bible). His followers (Mormons) traveled west and settled in what is now Utah.

You may have noticed that Mormons have been in the news lately- the raid of the Fundamentalist LDS compound in Texas got a lot of publicity a few years ago and just last week the former "Prophet" of that compound was convicted on two counts of sexual assault of underage girls. What you may not know is that the "modern" LDS church does not recognize these "Fundamentalists" as being Mormons. The modern LDS church holds that this "breakaway sect" is misguided and not led by the true Prophet (think Pope of the LDS church)- basically they've gone astray.

It's statements like this that bother me:
"The FLDS, which has at least 10,000 members, is a radical offshoot of mainstream Mormonism and believes polygamy brings exaltation in heaven." (from The Washington Post article on Warren Jeffs' conviction.)

The thing is, if you look at LDS church history, there is nothing radical about the idea of plural marriage, marriage to young girls or the idea that having multiple wives is the way to please God.

BYU, the University sponsored by the modern LDS church is named after Brigham Young- a guy who had 55 wives, some who were taken from their previous husbands to be married to him. Did I mention this guy was the "President" (again, think Pope) of the Mormon Church at the time? He is still revered as a historical church leader who was instrumental in shaping the early LDS church.

A "Fundamentalist" is someone who goes back to the basics- in this case, back to the teachings of Joseph Smith and Brigham Young.

The teaching of plural marriage was abandoned by the Mormon church in 1890, when the Church President experienced a divine revelation that plural marriage should cease. This revelation (known as "The Manifesto") conveniently put an end to the Mormon's disagreements with the U.S. Government and allowed Utah to become a state. Doctrines and teachings were adjusted accordingly.
 
If you want to be honest, the modern LDS church is the offshoot, not the compound-dwelling child abusers. They're living the real thing, the way it was intended to be.

Think about it.

For the full article on Warren Jeffs conviction, click here

On Books: Mere Christianity

This book is powerful.

I read this book for the first time last year and I'm going to read it again soon. From start to finish, it is a well-thought out explanation of Christianity from a philosophical point of view. I think it's important to note here that Lewis was at one point an athiest. I also think it is important that Lewis addresses only the true essence of Christianity, without taking space to address the differences and arguments that often exist between different Christian churches or denominations. It addresses Christianity in the most basic sense.

My favorite part about this book is that it's written for the layman. There is no haughty theological language or anything that the average person wouldn't understand. It's also not riddled with "church speak" (the "Christian" vocabulary people raised in church are indoctrinated with from a young age).

This book really challenged and changed me. It caused me to pause and think about what I truly believe. I began to draw distinctions between my personal experiences with God and things I believed simply because I had heard it from a pastor somewhere at one point. Christianity is special because it is personal. It is the only religion I know of that allows man and God to commune and have a relationship: a friendship. It is a shame that the one thing that sets Christianity apart is the thing that is often missing when Christianity is taught.

This is a good book, regardless of what your personal spiritual beliefs are. It is well written and I would suggest it to anyone who is interested in the basis of Christian beliefs- regardless of their personal stance on the truth of Christianity. It's worth reading.

Really.

On Breakfast

I always say that someday I would love to own a restaurant.

When it gets right down to it, I'm not sure that I would like the hours and the pressure and everything else that it would entail. What I really love is creating things in the kitchen. The Lieutenant commented recently that I cook like a madman- and it's true. I don't bake. Baking requires measuring and a precision that I don't have. I whirl around making last minute decisions and additions. Cooking is much more forgiving than baking, which allows me to run wild.

I've been experimenting with breakfast a lot recently
Here are some delicious combinations I have come up with.

The Greek:
Eggs with Caramelized Onions, Wilted spinach, Feta Cheese and a few Red Pepper Flakes. Add mushrooms if you like.
(I like to serve this one omelette style)

The Cowboy:
Scrambled Eggs, Maple Bacon Slices, Sauteed Shallots and Pepper Jack Cheese
(The Lieutenant actually assisted on this one. We served it on a hot buttered bagel as a sandwich)

The Mexican:
Eggs with Green Peppers, Red Onions, Fresh Jalapenos, Topped with Salsa and Cottage Cheese.
(I like this best as a scramble, with a side of whole wheat toast)

The Country Boy:
Eggs and Country Ham with Melted Brie.
(This one is good served platter-style or as an omelette. Serve either with a side of whole wheat toast)

The New England:
Eggs with Sauteed Mushrooms, Onions, Maple Bacon Pieces, and Sharp Cheddar Cheese.
(I've done this as an omlette, but I think it would also be excellent as a sandwich on a croissant)


The great thing about breakfast as a starting place is that it's pretty forgiving and inexpensive to experiment with. It's food even my father (The Woodsman) can make. I hope my experiments inspire you to start some of your own. It doesn't take much to make a great breakfast and it's the little things that take it from blasé to fab! Don't be afraid!

& happy cooking! :]

On Marriage: Being Slippers

I’ve come to the conclusion that the thing I fear most about getting married is the slippers.

Let me explain.

In the beginning my relationship with The Lieutenant, I was a pair of high heels. In comparing myself to a pair of footwear, I don’t mean to say that I always wore high heels (in fact for a person of such meager stature, I rarely do). What I mean is that the “me” that I most often portrayed was put-together. Heels are almost always slipped on when you are just about ready to walk out the door- after your hair has been fixed and your makeup is pristine. Heels never see you just out of bed, or sick with the flu, or covered in flour in the kitchen. You wear your heels when you are at your best. And so I was a pair of high heels.

Within the first year, I began to find that although being a pair of high heels is nice, there are times when it becomes very impractical. It is impossible, for instance, to be a pair of high heels when you are frolicking in the snow or playing tennis. As our relationship has progressed it has become more and more frequent for The Lieutenant to see a "me" that is still fun, but in a more practical way. And I am ok with being a pair of tennis shoes or a set of ski boots because these also have their use.


What I fear most about getting married is becoming a pair of slippers. Slippers are not glamorous or sexy. They are not even useful or practical. They are comfortable. This is not always a bad thing. Slippers keep your feet warm. Sometimes, when you’ve been walking around as a pair of high heels all day long, you can’t wait to get home and just be a pair of slippers.

The Lieutenant doesn’t mind my being a pair of slippers sometimes. In fact, I think he would be a little put off if I was always a pair of high heels. He says that it doesn't matter.

He says that I’m beautiful. Period.

But I still fear becoming a pair of slippers. More than that, I fear losing what it feels like to be a pair of high heels in the dirty dishes and baby poo of the years to come. I fear that even when I leave the slipper-me at home, I’ll look out of place as a pair of high heels.

On Smart Snacks

I like snacks.

I'm not the kind of person who can be content with eating "3 square meals a day"
I like variety and I like snacks.

I used to do traditional, random snacking but I have recently found this method to cause a problem. I work at a educational housing complex home to 900 students. Our clubhouse offers students a free tanning bed, fully equipt fitness center, and lots and lots of snacks. Although we have tried offering alternatives, the most appreciated and requested foods always turn out to be Cheez-Its and the like. The oatmeal goes untouched (relatively speaking, of course, these ARE still starving college students we're talking about here). Unfortunately for me, this means that a random craving at the office will inadvertantly lead to my eating something with the nutritional value of dyed cardboard.

My new snacking methog is smart snacking. The thing with smart snacking is that you have to plan for it. Buy snack-able things that will satisfy the need for variety and also offer some kind of nutritional value. And pack stuff you LIKE (otherwise you may end up eating the Cheez-its anyway!). It's not about weight and calories, it's about nutrition.

Think about it!

Disaster View

I can't get over these pictures. 

Earthquake, tsunami, nuclear explosion... The devastation in Japan is so total. It's hard to remember that what I'm looking at is an photograph of real events and not just a screenshot from a movie. The scariest thing to me is how unbelievable it is. It's easy to go about my day and assume that the things I own or the life I live is permanent. I guess that's why it's hard to look at these pictures. It's a reminder that everything I think is just a given- food, shelter, clean water... life- can really all disappear in an instant. 

I'm praying for those affected in Japan but I'm also praying that those of us who have never experienced loss like this remember that there is nothing we can do in our own power to avoid it. And that's really humbling.

Red Camaro

I saw a red Camaro today and I thought of you.
Some days I don't, but today I did.
It wasn't the anniversary or your birthday.
It was just a normal Thursday in a normal work week.
But I saw a red Camaro and I thought of you.
I wondered where you'd be and what you'd be doing.
What kind of job you'd have.
Then I thought you'd probably be in our wedding.
If you were still here.
I saw a red Camaro today and I thought of you.
And I missed you.

Title Shop

I'm trying on new blog titles. The old one was ok. Sometimes, though, just getting out there and trying on new things can give you a whole new perspective. And like buying a new outfit, comfort is only half of the equation. I also need something that fits and matches my style and personality. Yeah, a pair of Crocs may be comfortable, but who's going to take you seriously when wearing them? Nobody. That's who.

Snow Over Girds

This is one of my favorite pictures from this past winter. I took it in the early morning, before I left my house for work. I love how everything is kind of quiet at that time of the morning. To me, it's a perfect time for reflection and for appreciating beautiful moments that I might overlook during the rest of my busy day. Like this picture. Who ever thought The Girds could be so beautiful?

On Bride-zilla

I'm engaged

Bouncing around with my head in the clouds and a smile on my face, I've been in a state of happy euphoria for about a week now; a state that has only been broken a few times. Usually these breaks come as a result of un-sought and unneeded advice.

"You know, it takes between 8-12 months to plan a wedding."

"You should really look for a wedding dress that is..."

"You know, it's traditional for the bride to..."

and my personal favorite:

"Have you thought about waiting?"

What is it about major life decisions that makes people instantly think you are in need of their ideas and opinions? (My very pregnant friend confirms that this phenomenon only intensifies when bearing children is the issue at hand) Although opinions may be expressed out of a desire for my well-being, it is overwhelming to be bombarded with all this advice and worldly wisdom.

This constant flow of advice has given me a new perspective on the term "Bridezilla." Perhaps a Bridezilla is not, as we always thought, a self-centered diva who must have everything her own way. Perhaps Bridezilla was nicknamed so for refusing the "helpful" advice given by those who bombarded  her with their ideas of what her wedding should be.

I feel for her.

On Valentine's Day

Sonnet 116
(the original with my own re-phrasing)

Let me not to the marriage of true minds admit impediments.
Love is not love which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove:
O no! it is an ever-fixed mark that looks on tempests and is never shaken;
It is the star to every wandering bark,
whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.
Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks within his bending sickle's compass come:
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,
But bears it out even to the edge of doom.
                     If this be error and upon me proved,
                            I never writ, nor no man ever loved.

On Paranormal Activity

Could we please get another mythical love story (geared towards females between the ages of 13 and 17)?

Apparently so.

While browsing the aisles of Barnes and Noble the other day, I noticed that apparently there is an entire section of the store dedicated to this crowd, as The Twilight Saga and The Vampire Diaries are joined by a host of other novels of the same type. It begs the question, when did vampires go from scary to sexy? What changed Dracula from the stuff of horror movies and halloween costumes into a teen heart throb?

And isn't it a bit disconcerting that not only teenage girls, but grown adults are now lusting after Edward Cullen's porcelain bod? There are actually online forums that are entirely devoted to mothers who are obsessed with The Twilight Saga. One mother says,

"I am completely hooked on Edward Cullen (as a 42 year old mom and wife)."

Another makes this statement:

"I CANNOT stop thinking about [Edward]. I so wish there was someone in my life who looked at and felt about me that way. Again, I love my husband, but that passion has been absent from our lives for a long time. We are best friends, which is a blessing, but there is no passion."

Wow.

Am I the only one mildly upset to see adult women comparing their husbands to a fictional print character? I myself do not have a husband, but can imagine what marital troubles this could cause. I mean after all, Edward isn't human. He would never leave his dirty socks on the bedroom floor or forget to hang up his wet bath towel. Edward can read minds, and carry me on romantic piggy-back, tree-climbing excursions. Sure he drinks blood and doesn't have a soul but hey, those are minor flaws compared with dirty socks.

In all seriousness, though, enough is enough. Someone needs to get these insane fans in check

Now if you'll excuse me, I've got to go. This last chapter of New Moon and is keeping me on pins and needles.

Flu View

I think I have the flu.

I'm not sure, because technically the flu is just a virus and can't be tested for or controlled by medication. Cures for the flu include bed rest and fluids. Those affected may also be advised, as in my sister's case, to "stay away from other people". How one is to do this while living in a dormitory remains a mystery. The amazing thing about the flu is it's resilience. Each time a vaccine is developed against it, it simply mutates enough to remain effective against the human body. Swine and birds are also known to be particularly susceptible.

As I sit here coughing like an old smoker I wonder when modern medicine is going to do away with the flu once and for all. I hope it's not too soon. I, for one, have enjoyed my 3 day work week and an excuse to lay on the couch all day without being called lazy. Having the flu has suddenly made it OK for me to go to bed at 8:00, not do the dishes, and dictate what is watched on the TV.

The flu is perfect. Since it is not testable, it can be easily substituted for any physical malady one may have. Since it has no cure, its victims must simply be doted upon until they recover.

Why have we not thought of this before?

Hit List

Ladies and gentlemen, after much anticipation, here is 2011's list of
People who should not be famous:

Kristen Stewart
The Kardashians (all of them)
KE$HA
Octomom
Paris Hilton
Perez Hilton
The entire cast of Jersey Shore


These people have in no way contributed to society. As of today, I am revoking their celeb status.

Not So Special K (On Nutrition)

I don't know what it is about the snooze button. 5 more minutes can't honestly have that much of an impact on the rest of my day, but somehow I always feel it calling my name when my alarm goes off in the morning. By the time I get myself going, it's always at least ten minutes later than I had hoped.

I can't blame it entirely on the snooze button, but breakfast has become somewhat of a struggle.

I suppose this is a good time to mention the food transformation I've been going through recently. I started off 2011 by doing a fast with a group of friends. The idea was to give something up for the month January and become centered and focused on what is really important in this new year. Our group members gave up different things- everything from Facebook to meat to desserts. I gave up all animal products, sugars, and processed foods.

This fast resulted in a couple of things. The first (unintended but happy) side effect was weight loss, which can in no way be attributed to lack of eating. In fact, I was eating a diet that included a lot of olive oil, nuts, and carbs (always whole grains of course). I was actually eating more frequently, if anything.

Another result of this fast is that I was less tired and less grumpy with the same amount of sleep. I didn't even really crave or miss the things I had given up after a while.

A third, and lasting result is that I have become a label reader. I am no longer interested in eating foods with ingredients that I cannot say, spell, or understand. I am also trying overall to be more conscious of what I put into my body as fuel.

Which brings us back around to the breakfast struggle. In all reality, it has less to do my alarm clock and more to do with the ingredients list. When I saw Special K Red Berries in the pantry I rejoiced, assuming the day had been saved by a wholesome, quick breakfast choice. After all, commercials claim that Special K will help you to lose weight and develop a more healthy lifestyle.

Imagine my surprise, then, when I found sugar to be the second ingredient followed shortly thereafter by high fructose corn syrup. Really? Did we really need to include both of these? Why not just one or the other? While I was pondering this the answer came to me. Eliminating the one would likely boost the other right to the top of the ingredient list.

Want a challenge? Read the labels of what you eat. It's kind of intense but really enlightening.

I opted for some shredded wheat, btw.

Dear Phil, (On Urban Legends)

Today, Punxsutawney Phil failed to see his shadow and predicted that we will have an early spring. Legend has it that if the sun is shining on February 2nd, there are 6 weeks of winter left. I'm sure all the spectators who braved the winter storm warning to see Phil were cheering him on as his shadow took the day off. Phil's prediction marked the 125th anniversary of his weather forecasting. Of those years, Phil has predicted early spring only 16 times.

These numbers aroused my natural curiosity so I did some research. I found that groundhogs live between 3-4 years in the wild and up to 10 years in captivity, yet Phil has been predicting the weather for over a century. Conclusively, Phil must either be the longest living groundhog in the history of the world or an impostor. Judging from the way the North East has been pummeled by storms this winter, I'd have to lean towards the latter.

Ladies and Gentlemen, we are being duped.

And here I was, ready for spring.

On Hit Music

I thought I'd share some of my favorite lyrics from current "hit" singles, with my own highlights and punctuation for emphasis.
(meant to be read expressively and preferably aloud)


From Raise Your Glass by PiNK:

We're gonna lose our minds tonight!
What's the dealio?
...
Call me up if you want gangsta!
Don't be fancy, just get dancey!
...
We will never be never be, anything but loud and nitty gritty dirty little freaks!


Contributed by Bruno Mars, Grenade:

You don't understand!
I’d catch a grenade for ya: yeah, yeah, yeah!
Throw my hand on a blade for ya! yeah, yeah, yeah.
I’d jump in front of a train for ya - yeah, yeah , yeah.
You know I'd do anything for ya! yeah, yeah, yeah!


(This title tells it all) WE R WHO WE R by Ke$ha

We make the hipsters fall in love
And we’ve got hot-pants on enough...
Got Jesus on my necklace.
...
Looking sick and sexy-fied!
...
DJ turn it up!
I’m so sick of being so serious!
It’s making my brain delirious!
I’m just talkin’ truth...
...
We’re selling our clothes, sleeping in cars, dressing it down, hitting on dudes
(HARD!)


And a personal favorite, Who Are You When I'm Not Looking by Blake Shelton:

My-Oh-My!
You're so good-looking!
Hold yourself together... like a pair of bookends.
But I've not tasted all your cooking!
Who ARE you when I'm not looking?




Excuse me while I go kill myself.

The Beginning

I've finally given in to blogging.

In middle school, everyone had a xanga or a livejournal or some other online medium of expression. Older readers may not remember this, as I think the trend began and ended swiftly. Or maybe it was a regional phenomenon special to growing up in the slow pace of the Shore. Regardless, I was a xanga queen.

I have to be honest:  I stumbled across my xanga login information recently and went to the page to take a look at my writings. After reading and laughing hysterically at several pages of what seemed like endless teenage angst, I promptly deleted the site. I wonder now, in starting this blog, if a future 40 year old version of myself might re-discover it and laugh at what I now find to be so important.

Nevertheless, I blog.